CANADIAN MILITARY RECRUITING A BUNCH OF ASSES, DONKEYS TO FIGHT TALIBAN

Russian 'war pig unit' in the Second World War

Bill Graveland reports that the Canadian military are going to use donkeys to help battle against the Taliban in Afghanistan.

Initial reports suggest that these asses are unrelated to those meth-using Canadian soldiers involved in drug trafficking.

Maj. Charles Jansen, the self-proclaimed “Ass-Master” is spearheading the donkey brigade idea.  Due to the poor health and overall quality of Afghani donkeys, the donkeys will be recruited and flown in from from Europe.

“In essence they’ll be able to use pack animals to deliver critical supplies like water and ammo in places where you can’t easily get to by any mechanized or aviation means”–Maj. ‘Ass-Master’  Jansen

Russian forces have long used pigs on the front lines of battle, but according to Jansen, the Americans have studied the use of a wide variety of animals in the battlefield, including camels, dogs and mules, and the donkey came out on top in the ratings.

“most animals will bolt but a donkey will run for 200 or 300 metres and then stop,”–Maj. ‘Ass-Master’ Charles Jansen

When asked about the suitability of the donkeys on the front lines of a war, Prime Minister Harper said “They tell us that unlike other animals donkeys will not run away from battle, but I would like to reassure all Canadians that none of the recruited donkeys will be French, just to make sure.”